Our ways of falsely controlling our worlds and defending ourselves tend to fall into three major types. Each of us has all of these strategies, but one is always dominating. By recognizing how we operate and what drives us, and bringing mindfulness to our lives, we can lessen the amount this controls us and act more in accordance with our higher selves.
The reason type tends to seek control by remaining aloof, above the messiness of the human condition. They can be prideful and self-righteous, as well as withholding and isolating.
Because the reason types tend to be frightened of the messiness of their own needs, they pretend that they don’t need. This type settles for respect rather than risking love.
Abyss: the terror of the human chaos of relational emotions: lost-ness, helplessness, powerlessness; afraid of the messiness of real human intimacy.
Higher-self Rays: wisdom and adaptability
Mask (what is projected to the world): serenity
False Self: pseudo independence
The Emotion type tries to control by drawing and feeding from others. They covertly manipulate others to get them to love them and take care of them. They seek dependency rather than risk love. They don’t trust that there is something for real that is reliable, self-sustaining and dynamic within.
Abyss: the fear of separateness and abandonment. Tend to cling to others rather than stand in their own strength.
False Self: neediness and clinging
Higher-self Rays: lovingness, kindness, tenderness and compassion
The Will Type seeks perfection and control to get safety. They seek admiration instead of risking love. Others are the casualty in their search for perfection in themselves, in their environments and from others. They will walk on others to get their own way – self will run riot. “I’ll make you love me.”
Abyss: the terror of feeling humiliated and bad
False Self: a strong idealized self-image, can be dominating and inflexible
Higher-self Ray: true power. They are the movers and shakers in the world. At their best they are brave and huge risk takers. They can accomplish more than many people put together.
So these are the false idols in which we put our trust, rather than the one true higher being – our divine inner core.
The bottom line is that we all long for love and connection, and are mostly afraid and feel unentitled and undeserving of it. We have given up on ourselves and love. Instead we control and settle for respect, admiration and manipulated love. And while we recognize the lack of fulfillment, we are afraid to give up the status quo, the familiar, even though it is painful, rather than risk what we might have to go through in order to create and expand our lives.
RECOMMENDATIONS FOR CONTINUED GROWTH
The way out is the way in. By being responsible for, and present to, our behavior types, by noticing our fears and especially by feeling our feelings, we can, sometimes gradually, sometimes profoundly, alter the way we walk in the world. The opportunity is to operate more and more out of our higher selves. From the Pathwork lectures:
There is a whole, for you, intangible world which is extremely tangible in reality. In fact, it is much more tangible than the world you know as real.
The world you know as real is a reflection, a mirror image, an outer projection your real self is thrust into in order to fulfill a task.
Give the free gift of real love by letting others be, even if this means a loss at the moment. Let go in trust and faith that life wants to shower you with its gifts.
The more you thus establish an attitude of truth in you, the more will you know the inner beauty, the inner world of reality that can never perish.
This material is from the Pathwork Lectures and John Pierokos, MD, author of “Core Energetics” body work, the psychiatrist who was the husband of Eva Pierokos who channeled the Pathwork material. Edited by Sue Van Doeren and Bill Weil